An update--a baby girl!...

Dear Lexa,

Thank you.

Months ago, I wrote to you asking for help.

I was pregnant, and my man had left me, screaming obcenities
and threats at me as he went. I was scared that he would make good
on his threat to take my baby; I was scared that I wouldn't be able
to get through the pregnancy and the hard winter alone, and I was
just very sad.

You wrote a kind post, and told me about the Goddess Durga,
and instructed me to perform a chant in her honour, requesting her
aid.

I did as you told me to, and things are much better than
they were. I credit your help and the assistance of Durga with the
improvements in my condition. Thank you.

My beautiful baby girl, Anna Clotilde, is almost two months
old now. She was born on May 29th, at seven thirty in the evening.
She was born healthy and strong.

I got through the hard winter, and my midwives told me that
all the walking I did (I have no car and funds were too tight to
take the bus most of the time-- good food for the baby was my
priority), all the snow shoveling, all the housework and swimming
and yoga, all of that kept Anna moving around in the amniotic
fluid, helping her develop the wonderful muscle tone she was born
with.

Anna takes such pleasure in her own physicality-- it makes
me happy to see my heavy-bodied lonely struggling transformed into
such a good thing. Every one remarks on how strong and solid and
lively she is. Devi the student midwife called her "Superbaby".

I gave birth to Anna at my mother's house. Anna
was born in her grandmother's bathtub. I ran a bath for myself and
had her there just instinctually. My Mum cut the cord, so three
generations of our family's female line were involved in that act.
This was powerful and healing.

My man did not come. Instead, my friend Cass, who provided me
with consistent love and friendship (and a supply of juicy gossip)
through the whole pregnancy was there. While we waited, we watched
movies and took walks and baked and made art and wrote and sewed
things. It was great.

Coming with me to my hometown to stay at my Mum's until the
baby came was the first time Cass had ever left the States. She
said that her month at Mum's fufilled a "seven year dream" she had
had for a real holiday with no work, but one where she wasn't
spending her savings on accomodations or food.

Despite all the trouble my man and my broken heart were
giving me, being pregnant was a tender and powerful time in my
life. Giving birth to Anna was the strongest and best thing I have
ever done. I love my daughter and I love being her mother.

Thank you and Goddess Durga for helping me to appreciate my
power and strength at a time when all I felt was abandoned and
vulnerable and fearful for the well being of my baby.

Anna and I had a powerful birth-- my membranes were ruptured
for three days, then I had over thirty hours of early labour,
through which I gardened and prepared food for the midwives and
organized the birth room, and then five hours of active labour,
well supported by my excellent midwife and her student. I did not
need drugs, and I moved around and made noise as I saw fit. It was
amazing.

E--- told me that he will not try to take Anna from me, and
as that was at the heart of my fears when I consulted you, I thank
you again for helping me to protect my daughter.

He has visted twice, the second time with his parents. Those
visits have been intense and both good and terrible. His Dad got
drunk and refered to me by the name of E---'s ex-girlfriend all
through dinner with my whole family, but hey.

E--- loves his daughter-- he was shocked by his love for her-
- - and he loves me, too, in a twisted up way that hurts me-- and
clearly also him, his family, and my family-- to be near.

I feel an odd and powerful mix of anger and compassion when I
think of him, and I don't know where things will go. He is
volitile, so the situation still seems dangerous, but I am stronger
and clearer more powerful than he is, and Anna was born safely and
she is strong, too. We are a good pair.

His mother has decided that she and her husband need to seek
counseling, which is a good thing, and she is at last urging E---
to seek help as well. She said that Anna "melted her heart", which
is a powerful image. Thank you and Goddess Durga for that shift in
her.

I hadn't realized that in the American South you can say
anything about anyone as long as you tack the phrase "bless his (or
her) little heart" onto the end of what you said.

For example: E---'s mother was shocked that all the gardens
in my mother's neighbourhood were different from one another, as
they have rules against that in her gated community.

She handled my mother's lesbianism better this time, as they
discovered that they both like quilting and other women's
handicrafts-- it was funny to watch them bond-- but she could not
get over the fact that Mum's neighbour, who is a surgeon, has a
clothes line for his laundry.

She's too narrow minded to understand a surgeon with a clothes
line, bless her little heart.

See! It works! I love the "bless his little heart" trick. It is
magic. You get to say what you need to say without being full of
scorn or rage yourself, and you disarm the anger your comment or
opinion might otherwise be greeted with.

E---'s father is a raging drunk, bless his little heart.

It makes you feel good instead of bad--magic. Jesus said to
bless those who curse you, and there are probably many other
sources of this same information-- it does seem to make things flow
in a better direction if you add a blessing.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

As I am trying to figure out how to be a self-supporting
single mother of a newborn, and how I'm going to either convince
school to give me back my scholarship or find a new avenue to go
down to reach my goals, I am short on cash money funds.

All I can give you right now is my gratitude and my
testemonial.

I will do my best to share what I know and can do as generously
as you share your wisdom and skills with those in need.

At some point, I will have enough saved to pay you for a
reading for my new daughter-- as her mother, I would like to know
how to support and help her to do what she needs to do in this
life.

Here, too, are some pictures of my Anna.

Thank you, Lexa Rosean.

Sasha

Dear Sasha
I have not been inspired to post on this blog in months and your heartfelt email has broken the dry spell. So pleased and honored to be of assistance and thrilled with the outcome!

Anna is some looker! (Sorry readers, I don't post pics of newborns on the blog.) And you've given her one of the most powerful and oldest of the goddess names :) She is also born one day after me and as a Gemini, I'm sure she will be creative and a natural born psychic and channeler. I am sending you Anna's astrological chart as a gift (under separate cover) because I am so moved by your letter and life. I hope the charts and interpretations will give you insight into her soul.

It's great to hear about how you are acknowledging and dealing with your anger toward the ones you love. It sounds like right now there is more to hate about E (and his family) than there is to love about him. So it's good you are not together. Hopefully the magic of therapy will turn that around and he'll become a good dad and maybe even great husband. But for now, it sounds like you and Anna are in a great place and I wish you many blessings and continued protection from the Durga.
blessed be
Lexa

Your Cheatin' Heart

Witch Dr

my man is cheatin' on me again. I'd appreciate any strong potion you have in your magic cauldron there to make this thing called love work. I'm goin' nuts and short of hittin' him over the head with the fryin' pan and knockin' him out - I'm runnin' out of ideas to make him stay at home and love me (exclusively) the way he should (and took vows to do)! I heard tell about the menstrual blood spell but I'm past the bleeedin' time. Is there anything else I can do to help my man be true? Or am I just...

- Crazy for Tryin'


Dear Crazy

It's understandable that you're pissed off and I encourage you to channel that anger in a positive way to help release some of the poison in your relationship. I also imagine that you must be deeply hurt and in need of a good cry. So in the spirit of Patsy Cline, I offer you an ingredient more powerful than menstrual blood* to keep your man from cheating.

When tears come down like fallin' rain

you'll want to cry them out while calling his name. You'll also want to wet the corner of a bedsheet with your tears. Use it as you would a tissue or hanky to dry your eyes. It must be a sheet that you and he have slept together on (but not necessarily made love on although that would further empower the spell). Tear off the corner of this sheet with the tears soaked in and sprinkle some cumin inside. Cumin is used in spells to keep a mate from wandering and also prevents others from stealing your lover. Fold the sheet corner in half and stitch the open ends together (with the cumin inside) using white thread. Now place this small pouch inside your man's favorite pillow so that his head will lay upon it. You will also need to sprinkle a small amount of cumin inside his left shoe. Sprinkle the cumin underneath the inside lining of the shoe so that it won't be noticed. Cumin should also be added to his diet and can easily be used to season several tasty dishes. You can fortify this spell by incorporating another daily ritual. Although oranges increase feelings of love and sexuality, orange juice is used to help tame the libido and should be served to him every morning before he leaves the house. After he leaves, light a white candle and repeat the mantra "Be True" 40 times. I've also included some special mood music (and lyrics) below to accompany your ritual work:

While I give to you
And you give to me
True love, true love
So on and on
It will always be
True love, true love

For you and I have a guardian angel
On high with nothing to do
But to give to you
And to give to me
Love forever true

But to give to you
And to give to me
Love forever true
Love forever true

- Written by Cole Porter
(Recorded by Patsy Cline 8/17/61)

may all your magickal endeavors be blessed in light and love
WD

* a note about the menstrual blood. It is well known among the witches that a drop of menstrual blood placed in the morning coffee will keep a man (or a woman) true. However, this must be repeated on a monthly basis and it is considered borderline black magick as it is a way of controlling another individual. The spell is also very powerful and difficult to undo.

Thirteen for Love TT#6

Here's hoping you all had a great Valentine's Day. For those of you who did, here's some info to keep the love flowing and for those of you who didn't, here's some info to heal the heartache.The herbs, flowers, and assorted ingredients below can be mixed together in any combination you desire. They can be collected in a sachet and carried near the heart or placed under the pillow or mattress. They can also be added to the bathwater or sprinkled around a love altar or even a room. Some can even be eaten. These come from The Encyclopedia of Magickal Ingredients. Check it out for more information to personalize your spellcasting.

1. Lemon Peel
A great one for clearing obstacles in the love life. Use after a fight to clear the air or use when your road seems blocked from meeting someone new.

2. Rose Buds
Attracts new friends and budding romance.

3. Orange Peel
Sexy sexy stuff!!! Also used for marriage spells and to bless sacred unions.

4. Jasmine Flowers
Creates mystery and allure. Also used to empower a relationship and intensify the love and commitment.

5. Almond (pure extract or whole nut)
For fidelity.

6. Ketchup
For love attraction. That's right! Call out the name of someone who's love you want to win while you eat it. (but go easy on the fries!)

7. Melon
The fruit of adultery.

8. Celery
Sex and fertility.

9. Oysters
Increases orgasms in women and makes men better lovers.

10. Passionflower
Name is misleading for this herb is actually used to cool the passions. Good for teens to keep their virginity intact and great to carry on the job to ward off sexual harassment.

11. Peas
Sacred to the goddess Venus and brings domestic bliss.

12. Cardamom
An aphrodisiac. Draws love and sensuality into your life.

13. Oregano
Increases pleasure and brings success when added to any love spell.

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Consulting the Oracle

For those of you who remember the Dilemma post, KW needs to decide whether to stay with her lesbian lover (LL) or get back with her ex husband (EH) (who is now remarried with kids.) The Witch Dr will attempt to help KW gain insight into this situation through the use of astrology and the tarot. KW will also be making comments on these posts so we can get some feedback on the reading. KW has asked 3 questions:

1. With whom would I be able to have the most satisfying relationship?

2. Will he ever leave his wife?

3. Both he and I are attracted to each other; is this a phase? Guilt for the way we treated each other in the past; in other words, is it 'real'?

Witch Dr will begin with Question #3. Is this a phase? Is it real?

KW is a Libra with Scorpio Rising. Her ex husband is Aquarius with Pisces Rising. KW's sun rests in his 7th house which is a perfect placement for marriage. There is no doubt that these two were (and still are) compatible. At the same time, EH has a natal Saturn placement in his 7th house which means he will get divorced (most likely from a Libra) and we know that this has already happened. This placement creates long lasting bonds with Librans but also constant power struggles. If this was a cause of the initial break up, it is likely to occur again. However, since he is older and wiser now, the Saturn may very well act in their benefit and the power struggles may soften with age.

I would not question that the natural attraction between KW & EH is real and continues to live and breathe. However, EH has the transiting Neptune conjunct his Natal Sun in the 12th House and right on the cusp of the Ascendant. This would indicate that EH does not see things clearly at this time. In fact, he may even be slightly delusional. The same transiting Neptune is conjunct KW's natal Moon and this configuration is a very dangerous one. It can cause relapses of drug or alcohol addiction so she must be extremely careful and make sure to get all the support she needs. It also creates that classic "bewitched" feeling that I fondly like to refer to as the "psychotic state of falling in love". Those under the influence of this transit often fall in love with totally unavailable or inappropriate partners. This coupled with all the Scorpio in KW's chart will most likely result in great disappointment once the desire is fulfilled. Because it is probably more likely that she is in love with longing than in love with EH.

My analysis would be that this is not REAL as far as whatever romantic and intensely passionate feelings have arisen between the two of them however, there is a strong foundation in the chart for a deeper more reality based kind of love. "What in the hell does that mean, Lexa" , is what you now may be asking. Well, it means simply that sometimes it is better to marry when you are not "in love". The charts suggest that these two would need to see how things fall out in the daily life through real contact (not just emails) and not just sex (which will probably work out just fine.) When consulting the Tarot on this question, I am told that it is not real but rather something from the past that refuses to let go because the issue wants to be healed and resolved so that she can move on. The tarot also says that EH is interested and willing to have an extra marital affair...

Bewildered!

Dear Lady Venus -

I'm totally confused and now in a real funk over a situation. My boyfriend (Taurus) and I (Scorpio) are truly in love. Everything seemed to be going fine until the weekend before Halloween when all hell broke loose. It seems like we lost the connection and now all attempts to communicate since then have failed. We've had disagreements before and worked things through, but in the past two weeks whenever we talk, it ends up turning into an argument that escalates and makes things worse. We were also caught off guard when both of our exes appeared on the scene and started causing all kinds of trouble. Does this have something to do with Halloween? I knew it was a kind of spooky holiday, but this is truly weird. Do you think I offended some spirits or someone put a hex on us? What can I do to make this right? I'm so sad and at a loss for what to do. Please help!

- Perplexed Polly

Dear Polly,

It sounds like you and your beau definitely got "tricked" but I would venture to guess that the source of your difficulties did not stem from Halloween but rather from the dreaded MERCURY RETROGRADE which began on Sunday the 29th of October. I'm sure both of you are experiencing a more intensified version than the rest of the signs as Mercury is in Scorpio. That means the planet is conjunct your sun (think SIDESWIPED) and it is in opposition to your boyfriend's sun (think HEAD ON COLLISION)! Mercury retrograde is infamous for causing communication problems and also for dragging ex lovers out of the woodwork. Best thing to do is JUST SIT TIGHT. The planet will begin its forward motion on the 18th of November and you should be able to sort it all out then. If you need a little something to take the edge off, I suggest burning white and pink candles alternatively. These colors are for stress reduction and love healing. Rub some lavender oil on the candles or sprinkle a circle of dried lavender flowers around the candles. This will help to calm you both down and open the lines for constructive communication. As for the exes haunting you, let them know that Halloween is OVER and it's time to GO BACK FROM WHENCE THEY CAME! If that doesn't work, use ye old trusty freezer spell.

best of luck in love
Lady V

Tis' NOT The Season

Dear Lexa,
In your book, Easy Enchantments, the spell 'To Mend A Broken Heart or To Soothe Feelings of Love', it calls for fresh lilacs. Is there a substitution that can be made during times of the year when fresh lilacs are not available? My friend and I are still learning but we have found your books and advice to be some of the best. My best friend has had the unfortunate luck to fall for a young man that has broken her heart. This combined with some lifelong bad luck has laid her low. She and I have struggled to make things better for not only herself but for all those that were around and we thought that this spell might be a solid addition to our efforts. The only problems are that 1.) It's October2.)We live in a rural area - florists have given us very strange looks whenwe even ask about lilacs at this time of year. 3.) We're both in college and struggling with money - ordering lilacs from a special grower over the net is simply beyond what our checkbooks can handle. Any advice would be much appreciated. Thank you so much for the wonderful information that you have out there.
Sincerely,
Heather

Hi Heather

Thank you for the wonderful feedback. Your question is a good one and I mention quite often (usually in the introduction chapters of my books), that substitutions are generally valid although fresh is ALWAYS best. In this case, your friend can use Lilac scented soap or lilac oil which should be easier to find this time of year.

blessings

Lexa

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